[ENG TRANSLATION] Yuzuru Hanyu x Waseda Sports Part 1 – Excerpt from Group Interview

This is Part 1 of 3 of an article from Wasedasports.com published on 24 December 2019 which is a collection of excerpts from different interviews that Yuzuru Hanyu gave after the Japanese Nationals. Part 1 is an excerpt from a group interview. Parts 2 and 3 to come.

Translation: @yuzueco
Proofreading: @blueflame4yuzu, @axelsandwich

โ€•โ€•FSใ‚’ๆŒฏใ‚Š่ฟ”ใฃใฆใ„ใ‹ใŒใงใ—ใŸใ‹

What did you think of todayโ€™s free program ?

ใ„ใ‚„ใ‚ใ€ๅผฑใ„ใชใ‚ใฃใฆใ€‚ๅ…ˆใ€…้€ฑ๏ผˆใ‚ฐใƒฉใƒณใƒ—ใƒชใƒ•ใ‚กใ‚คใƒŠใƒซใฎ้š›๏ผ‰ใ‚‚่จ€ใฃใฆใ„ใพใ—ใŸใŒใ€ๅผฑใ„ใชใ‚ใฃใฆใ€‚

Well, I feel that I am weak. I said this two weeks before (at GPF) as well, but I feel that I am weak.

โ€•โ€•๏ผ”ๅนดใถใ‚Šใฎๅ…จๆ—ฅๆœฌใ€ใƒ•ใ‚กใƒณใฎๆ–นใ€…ใ‚‚ใŸใใ•ใ‚“ๅฟœๆดใ—ใฆใ„ใพใ—ใŸ

You participated in the Japanese nationals for the first time in four years and many fans were cheering you on passionately.

ใ“ใ‚“ใชๆผ”ๆŠ€ใงใ‚‚ๆœฌๅฝ“ใซใŸใใ•ใ‚“ใฎๆ–นใ€…ใŒใ™ใ”ใๅฟœๆดใ—ใฆใใ ใ•ใฃใฆใ„ใฆใ€ๆœ€ๅพŒใพใงๅŠ›ใ‚’ใใ ใ•ใฃใฆใ„ใฆใ€‚ใพใ‚ๆœ€ๅพŒใฎๆœ€ๅพŒใ“ใ‘ใกใ‚ƒใ„ใพใ—ใŸใ‘ใฉใ€ๆญฏใ‚’้ฃŸใ„ใ—ใฐใฃใฆใ‚„ใ‚ŒใŸใจๆ€ใฃใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใฎใงใ€‚ๆœ€ๅพŒใพใง่ฆ‹ใฆใใ ใ•ใฃใฆใ‚ใ‚ŠใŒใจใ†ใ”ใ–ใ„ใพใ™ใจใ—ใ‹่จ€ใˆใชใ„ใงใ™ใ€‚

So many people were cheering me on and giving me power until the end despite my poor performance. I fell on the very last jump, but I think I gritted my teeth and did it. I can only say that I appreciate that they watched my performance until the end.

โ€•โ€•ๆฌกใฏใ€ไธ–็•Œ้ธๆ‰‹ๆจฉใŒๆŽงใˆใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใจๆ€ใ„ใพใ™

Your next competition is the World Championships.

ใใ†ใงใ™ใญโ€ฆโ€ฆใ€‚ไฝ•ใซๅ‡บใ‚‹ใฎใ‹ใ‚ใ‹ใ‚‰ใชใ„ใงใ™ใŒใ€ๆœฌๅฝ“ใซใ„ใพใ‚‚ใ†ใ€ๅผฑใฃใกใ„ใฎใงใƒซใƒผใƒ—ใ‚‚ใƒˆใƒผใƒซใƒผใƒ—ใ‚‚่ทณในใชใ„ใ‚ˆใ†ใงใฏ่ฉฑใซใชใ‚‰ใชใ„ใงใ™ใ—ใ€ใ‚ขใ‚ฏใ‚ปใƒซใ‚‚่ทณในใชใ„ใ‚ˆใ†ใงใฏๆœฌๅฝ“ใซ่ฉฑใซใชใ‚‰ใชใ„ใฎใงใ€‚ๆ‚”ใ—ใ„ใ€ๆ‚”ใ—ใ„ใงใ™ใ€‚ๆฌกใŒใ‚ใ‚Œใฐใ€ๆฌกใซๅ‘ใ‘ใฆใŒใ‚“ใฐใ‚Šใพใ™ใ€‚

It is…Iโ€™m not sure which competition I am going to participate in yet, but I am really weak now. There is no way that I can compete well without landing the quad loop and the toe loop, and also the triple axel, thereโ€™s truly no way. I am very unsatisfied with my current self. Iโ€™m kuyashii. If there is another chance, I will work hard for the next competition.

โ€•โ€•ๅผทใใชใ‚‹ใŸใ‚ใซใฉใ†ใ—ใฆใ„ใ‘ใฐใ„ใ„ใจใŠ่€ƒใˆใงใ™ใ‹

Whatโ€™s your thoughts on how to become stronger?

ใ‚ใ‹ใ‚‰ใชใ„ใงใ™ใ€‚ใ‚„ใ‚Œใ‚‹ใ“ใจใฏใ‚„ใฃใฆใ„ใŸใจๆ€ใ„ใพใ™ใ—ใ€๏ผ–ๅˆ†้–“๏ผˆ็ทด็ฟ’๏ผ‰ใพใงใฏใ‚ˆใ‹ใฃใŸใงใ™ใ—ใ€ๆ„Ÿ่ฆšใฏใใ‚“ใชใซๆ‚ชใ‹ใฃใŸ่จณใงใฏใชใ„ใฎใงใ€่‡ชๅˆ†ใฎ็ฒพ็ฅž็Šถๆ…‹ใจ่‚‰ไฝ“ใฎ็Šถๆ…‹ใจใ‚คใƒกใƒผใ‚ธใŒๅ…จ้ƒจใƒใƒฉใƒใƒฉใฃใฆไน–้›ข๏ผˆใ‹ใ„ใ‚Š๏ผ‰ใ—ใฆใ„ใฃใŸๆ„Ÿใ˜ใงใ™ใญใ€‚

I donโ€™t know. I think I was doing the best I could do, I felt good until the 6 min warm up, and the feeling was not that bad. It was like I could feel the dissonance between my mental and physical condition

โ€•โ€•ไปŠๅ›žใฎใ‚ธใƒฃใƒณใƒ—ๆง‹ๆˆใซใคใ„ใฆใฏใ„ใ‹ใŒใงใ—ใŸใ‹

Whatโ€™s your thoughts on your layout this time?

ๅ†’้ ญใ‹ใ‚‰ใƒŸใ‚นใ—ใฆใƒซใƒƒใƒ„ๆŠœใ‘ใฆใ€่‰ฒใ€…่€ƒใˆใพใ—ใŸใญใ€‚ใฉใ“ใงใƒชใ‚ซใƒใƒชใƒผใงใใ‚‹ใฎใ‹ใ€‚ใใ‚“ใชใƒชใ‚ซใƒใƒชใƒผใ™ใ‚‹ไฝ“ๅŠ›ใชใ‹ใฃใŸใชใฃใฆๆ€ใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚ๆœฌๅฝ“ใ€ใใ‚“ใชใƒชใ‚ซใƒใƒชใƒผใ™ใ‚‹ใชใ‚‰ๆ„ๅ‘ณใชใ„ใชใฃใฆๆ€ใฃใฆใ„ใพใ—ใŸใ€‚ใ‚ใ‹ใ‚‰ใชใ„ใงใ™ใ€‚ใใกใ‚ƒใใกใ‚ƒใชใฎใงใ€‚ใงใ‚‚ๆœฌๅฝ“ใซใ„ใพใ€ๆ˜Œ็ฃจ๏ผˆๅฎ‡้‡Ž๏ผ‰ใŒใ‚„ใฃใจๆˆปใฃใฆใใฆใใ‚Œใฆๆญฃ็›ดใ†ใ‚Œใ—ใ„ใงใ™ใ€‚ๅˆใ‚ใฆใกใ‚ƒใ‚“ใจ่ฒ ใ‘ใŸใ‚“ใงใ€‚ใ™ใ”ใใ†ใ‚Œใ—ใ„ใ‚“ใงใ™ใ‚ˆใญใ€‚ใฉใ†ใ„ใ†ใ†ใ‚Œใ—ใ•ใ‹ใจใ„ใ†ใจ้›ฃใ—ใ„ใ‚“ใงใ™ใ‘ใฉใ€‚ใงใ‚‚ใชใ‚“ใ‹ใ€ใกใ‚‡ใฃใจใปใฃใจใ—ใฆใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚

I made the mistake of popping the opening  Lutz and then I thought of many possibilities. About where I could make my recovery jump. But I don’t think I had the physical strength to make such a recovery. Really, I was thinking it’s meaningless even if I made that kind of recovery. So Iโ€™m not sure. I canโ€™t sort out my thinking. But now Shoma is finally back on track and to be honest, I am happy about it. This is the first time that I lost to him properly. Iโ€™m very happy about it. Itโ€™s difficult to describe what kind of happiness that is. But somehow, I feel relieved.

โ€•โ€•ใƒซใƒƒใƒ„ใฎๅคฑๆ•—ใฏ็–ฒๅŠดใŒ่ถณใซใใฆใ„ใŸใ“ใจใŒๅŽŸๅ› ใงใ—ใ‚‡ใ†ใ‹

Is the exhaustion in your feet the reason for your mistake on the Lutz ?

ไฝ•ใจ่จ€ใ†ใ‚“ใงใ™ใ‹ใญใ€ใ‚คใƒกใƒผใ‚ธใจใ€ใ“ใ†โ€ฆโ€ฆใ€‚ใ†ใƒผใ‚“โ€ฆโ€ฆๅ…จ้ƒจ่จ€ใ„่จณใใ•ใ่žใ“ใˆใ‚‹ใ‹ใ‚‰ใ€ๆœฌๅฝ“ๅซŒใงใ™ใ€‚ไฝ•ใ‚‚ๅ–‹ใ‚ŠใŸใใชใ„ใจใ„ใ†ใฎใŒๆœฌ้Ÿณใงใ™ใ€‚

Well…how can I say…what I thought about the image and..Hmm, whatever I say will sound like I’m making excuses for that mistake so I truly hate that. My honest feeling is that I donโ€™t want to say anything. 

โ€•โ€•ๆฐทใฎๆ„Ÿ่งฆใฏใ„ใ‹ใŒใงใ—ใŸใ‹

What was your feeling about the ice?

ๅคงไธˆๅคซใ ใฃใŸใจๆ€ใ„ใพใ™ใ—ใ€ใ‚„ใฃใฑใ‚Šใ“ใ†ใ‚„ใฃใฆๆœ€ๅพŒใพใงใ€้›ฃใ—ใ„็’ฐๅขƒใ ใฃใŸใจใฏๆ€ใ†ใฎใงใ™ใŒใ™ใ”ใใ„ใ„ๆฐทใงใ€ไฝœใฃใฆใใ ใ•ใฃใŸๆ–นใ€…ใซๆ„Ÿ่ฌใ—ใŸใ„ใงใ™ใ€‚

It was okay, and I think it was a difficult situation until the end for me but the ice was in good condition, so I want to thank the people who maintain that ice rink.

โ€•โ€•่ฒ ใ‘ใŸ็พฝ็”Ÿ้ธๆ‰‹ใŒใ€ใ€Œใปใฃใจใ—ใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใ€ใจใ„ใ†ใฎใŒ่กๆ’ƒ็š„ใงใ™ใ€‚ๆ—ฅๆœฌไบบ้ธๆ‰‹ใซ่ฒ ใ‘ใ‚‹ใฎใฏไน…ใ€…ใ ใจๆ€ใ„ใพใ™ใŒใ€ใใฎ็‚นใซใคใ„ใฆใฏใ„ใ‹ใŒใงใ™ใ‹

 It is quite shocking for us to hear Hanyu, who has lost, say, “I am relieved.” Itโ€™s been a while since youโ€™ve lost to a Japanese skater, how do you feel about it? 

ๆ˜Œ็ฃจใŒใคใ‚‰ใใ†ใซใ—ใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใฎใฏใšใฃใจ่ฆ‹ใฆใ„ใฆใ€ใใ‚ŒใŒใญใ€ใ‚„ใฃใจ่ฝใก็€ใ„ใฆใใฆใ‚นใ‚ฑใƒผใƒˆใซ้›†ไธญใงใใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใชใ€ใจใ„ใ†ใฎใ‚’ๆ€ใ†ใจใ‚„ใฃใฑใ‚Šใ†ใ‚Œใ—ใ„ใงใ™ใ€‚ๅพŒ่ผฉใจใ—ใฆใ“ใ‚Œใ‹ใ‚‰ใ‚‚ๅฝผใ‚‰ใ—ใ้ ‘ๅผตใฃใฆใปใ—ใ„ใงใ™ใ—ใ€‚ๅฟƒใ‹ใ‚‰ๅฟœๆดใ—ใŸใ„ใชใจๆ€ใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚

Iโ€™ve been seeing Shoma struggling for a long time, but to see that he has finally settled down and can focus on skating makes me happy. I’d like him to keep working hard in his own way, as my junior. I want to cheer him on from the bottom of my heart.

โ€•โ€•ใ‚ฐใƒฉใƒณใƒ—ใƒชใƒ•ใ‚กใ‚คใƒŠใƒซใ€ใใ—ใฆๅ…จๆ—ฅๆœฌใงๆ•—ๅŒ—ใ‚’ๅ‘ณใ‚ใ„ใ€้‡ๅœงใŒๆธ›ใฃใŸใจใ„ใ†ใ“ใจใฏใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ™ใ‹

You lost at the GPF and the Japanese Nationals, does that experience reduce the pressure on you?

ๅˆฅใซๆ—ฅๆœฌไบบใ ใ‹ใ‚‰ใใ‚ŒใŒใฉใ†ใ ใจใ„ใ†่ฉฑใงใฏใชใใ€็›ธๆ‰‹ใŒ่ชฐใ ใ‹ใ‚‰ใจใ„ใ†่ฉฑใงใฏใชใใ€ๅธธใซใ€Œๅ‹ใกใŸใ„ใชใ€ใจๆ€ใฃใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใฏ้–“้•ใ„ใชใใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ™ใ—ใ€‚ใ‚‚ใกใ‚ใ‚“ๆœ€ๅคง้™ใฎใ“ใจใฏใ“ใ“ใงใฏใงใใชใ‹ใฃใŸใฎใงใ™ใŒใ€ใงใ‚‚ๅƒ•ใชใ‚Šใซไธ€็”Ÿๆ‡ธๅ‘ฝใฏใ‚„ใฃใŸใจๆ€ใฃใฆใ„ใพใ™ใ—ใ€‚ๅˆฅใซใƒ—ใƒฌใƒƒใ‚ทใƒฃใƒผใ‹ใ‚‰่งฃใๆ”พใŸใ‚ŒใŸ่จณใงใฏใชใ„ใงใ™ใ€‚ใ‚„ใฃใฑใ‚Š่‡ชๅˆ†ใฎไธญใง็ขบๅ›บใŸใ‚‹่‡ชไฟกใจใ‹ใƒ—ใƒฉใ‚คใƒ‰ใฟใŸใ„ใชใ‚‚ใฎใฏใ‚ใฃใฆใ€‚ใ“ใ‚Œใ‹ใ‚‰ใŸใถใ‚“ๆ˜Œ็ฃจใŒ่ƒธใ‚’ๅผตใฃใฆใ€Žๅ…จๆ—ฅๆœฌ็Ž‹่€…ใ€ใจ่จ€ใˆใ‚‹ใจๆ€ใ†ใฎใงใ€‚ใ“ใจใ—ใฏๅ‡บใ‚‰ใ‚ŒใŸใ‹ใ‚‰ใ€ๅƒ•ใŒใ€‚ใ ใ‹ใ‚‰ใ€ใใ†ใ„ใ†ไธญใงใกใ‚‡ใฃใจ่ฟฝใ„ใ‹ใ‘ใฆ่„…ใ‹ใ—ใฆใ‚„ใ‚ใ†ใ‹ใชใจๆ€ใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚

It doesnโ€™t matter that I lost to the Japanese skater or whom I lost to, I always think that I want to win no matter what. Of course I couldnโ€™t do my best here, but I tried with all my might. So itโ€™s not something like I was released from the pressure. I have a firm conviction in myself or something like pride in myself. I think Shoma can say that he is the โ€œJapanese National Championโ€ proudly from now on. Because this year, I competed as well. So I think maybe I will chase him and threaten him a little from behind.

โ€•โ€•๏ผฆ๏ผณใฎๅ‰ใ€ใ†ใพใใ„ใ‹ใชใ„ไบˆๅ…†ใฎใ‚ˆใ†ใชใ‚‚ใฎใฏใ‚ใ‚Šใพใ—ใŸใ‹

Were there any signs that things might not go well before FS?

่ชฟๆ•ดใŒใ†ใพใใ„ใ‹ใชใ‹ใฃใŸใงใ™ใ€ใšใฃใจใ€‚่‡ชๅˆ†ใฎ่บซไฝ“ใŒใฉใ‚“ใฉใ‚“ๆ—ฅใซๆ—ฅใซๅŠฃๅŒ–ใ—ใฆใ„ใๆ„Ÿใ˜ใฏใ‚ใฃใฆใ€‚ใ‚ทใƒงใƒผใƒˆใฎๅ‰ใ‹ใ‚‰ใ€Œๅค‰ใ ใชใ€ใจใฏๆ€ใฃใฆใ„ใŸใ‚“ใงใ™ใ€‚ใใ‚Œใงใ‚‚ใ‚„ใฃใฑใ‚Šใ€ๅƒ•ใฏๆตใพใ‚Œใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใฎใงใ€่‰ฒใ‚“ใชๆ–นใซๆ”ฏใˆใฆใ‚‚ใ‚‰ใฃใฆใ€่บซไฝ“ใฎ็Šถๆ…‹ใ‚‚ใ„ใพใงใใ‚‹ๆœ€้ซ˜ใฎ็Šถๆ…‹ใซใ—ใฆใ‚‚ใ‚‰ใฃใŸใ†ใˆใงใ“ใ‚Œใชใฎใงใ€‚ๆญฃ็›ด่จ€ใฃใฆใ€ๅƒ•ใฎๅฎŸๅŠ›ใจๆŠ€่ก“ใŒ่ถณใ‚Šใชใ‹ใฃใŸใจใ„ใ†ๆ„Ÿใ˜ใงใ™ใ‹ใญใ€‚ใงใ‚‚ใ€ๆญปๅŠ›ใฏๅฐฝใใ›ใŸใจๆ€ใฃใฆใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚

The adjustment didnโ€™t go well throughout. I felt like my body was getting worse day by day. I noticed something was strange even before the SP. But even so, I am privileged to receive support from many people and I adjusted my body condition to the best that it could be at that point, then it turned out like that. So to be honest, I think my skill and ability was not enough. But I think I gave it everything I had

โ€•โ€•ใƒŸใ‚นใŒๅ‡บใŸใ‚ใจ้›†ไธญใŒๅˆ‡ใ‚ŒใŸใ‚ˆใ†ใซใ‚‚ๆ„Ÿใ˜ใ‚‰ใ‚Œใพใ—ใŸใŒใ€ใฉใฎใ‚ˆใ†ใช็Šถๆ…‹ใงใ—ใŸใ‹

โ€•โ€•It seemed that you lost your concentration after you made a mistake, but what was the situation?

ใณใฃใใ‚Šใ—ใกใ‚ƒใฃใฆใ€่‡ชๅˆ†ใฎไธญใงใ€‚ใ€Œใ‚ใ‚Œ๏ผŸใ€ใฃใฆใ€‚ๆ„Ÿ่ฆšใจๆœฌๅฝ“ใซไน–้›ขใ—ใฆใ„ใŸใ‚“ใงใ™ใ‚ˆใ€‚ใ„ใพใ‚‚ไน–้›ขใ—ใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใ‚“ใงใ™ใ‘ใฉใ€‚่‡ชๅˆ†ใฎ่จ€ๅ‹•ใŒใฉใ†ใชใฃใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใ‹ใฏใฃใใ‚Š่จ€ใฃใฆๅ…จ็„ถใ‚ใ‹ใ‚‰ใชใ„ใ€‚ๆฐ—ๆŒใกใจๅ–‹ใฃใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใ“ใจใ‚‚ๅˆฅใ€…ใซใชใฃใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใจใ“ใ‚ใŒๅคšใ€…ใ‚ใ‚‹ใ—โ€ฆโ€ฆใ€‚ใงใ‚‚ใ‚„ใฃใฑใ‚Šใ‚คใƒกใƒผใ‚ธใจ่‡ชๅˆ†ใฎ่บซไฝ“ใฎใ‚ญใƒฌใฟใŸใ„ใชใ‚‚ใฎใฏๅˆ†้›ขใฏใ—ใฆใ„ใฆใ€ ไฝ“ๅŠ›ใฎใ‚ใ‚‹ใ†ใกใ€ใ‚ทใƒงใƒผใƒˆใจใ‹ใ ใฃใŸใ‚‰ใชใ‚“ใจใ‹ใชใฃใŸใจๆ€ใ†ใฎใงใ™ใŒใ€ใฉใ†ใ—ใ‚ˆใ†ใ‚‚ใชใ„ใจใ“ใ‚ใŒๅ‡บใฆใ—ใพใฃใŸใฎใ‹ใชใจใ„ใ†้ขจใซใฏๆ€ใ„ใพใ™ใ€‚ใงใ‚‚ใ€ใฏใฃใใ‚Š่จ€ใฃใฆใ—ใพใˆใฐ็ซถๆณณใฎ้ธๆ‰‹ใชใ‚“ใ‹ใฏไฝ•ใƒฌใƒผใ‚นใ‚‚ใ‚„ใ‚‹ใ‚ใ‘ใงใ™ใ—ใ€‚ๅ†…ๅฎนใฏ้•ใ†ใ‹ใ‚‚ใ—ใ‚Œใชใ„ใ‘ใฉใ€‚ใใ†ใ„ใ†ใฎใซๆฏ”ในใฆใฟใŸใ‚‰ๅƒ•ใชใ‚“ใ‹๏ผ•้€ฑ้–“ใง๏ผ“ๅ›žใ—ใ‹่ฉฆๅˆใ—ใฆใ„ใชใ„ใ—ใ€‚ใใ‚Œใงใ“ใฎใใ‚‰ใ„ใฎไฝ“ๅŠ›ใ—ใ‹ใชใ„ใฎใ‹ใฃใฆใ€‚ๆœฌๅฝ“ใซ่‡ชๅˆ†ใŒๅŠ›ไฝฟใฃใฆ่ทณใ‚“ใ˜ใ‚ƒใฃใฆใ„ใ‚‹ใ‚“ใ ใชใจใ„ใ†ใฎใจใ€ใ‚‚ใฃใจๅŠ›ใ‚’ๆŠœใ„ใฆ่‡ชๅˆ†ใ‚‰ใ—ใ„ใ„ใ„ใ‚ธใƒฃใƒณใƒ—ใŒ่ทณในใ‚‹ใ‚ˆใ†ใซใ—ใชใ„ใจใ„ใ‘ใชใ„ใชใ€ใจใ„ใ†ใฎใ‚’ใ„ใพใฏ่€ƒใˆๅง‹ใ‚ใพใ—ใŸใ€‚่ซฆใ‚ใฆใฏใ„ใชใ„ใงใ™ใ€‚ๆœฌๅฝ“ใซใ€ๆœ€ๅพŒใพใงๆญปใซ็‰ฉ็‹‚ใ„ใงใ‚„ใฃใฆใ„ใพใ—ใŸใ€‚ใใ†ใ˜ใ‚ƒใชใใ‚ƒใƒ•ใƒชใƒƒใƒ—๏ผˆ๏ผ”ๅ›ž่ปขใƒˆใƒผใƒซใƒผใƒ—โ€•ใ‚ชใ‚คใƒฉใƒผโ€•๏ผ“ๅ›ž่ปขใƒ•ใƒชใƒƒใƒ—ใฎ๏ผ“ๅ›ž่ปขใƒ•ใƒชใƒƒใƒ—๏ผ‰่ทณใฐใชใ„ใงใ™ใ€ใ‚ใใ“ใ€‚

I was surprised, in my mind. Like โ€œWhatโ€™s going on?โ€. It was really different from what I was feeling. And it still is now. I can’t tell at all what is happening to my behavior to be honest. There are many areas where my feelings and what I am talking about feel like they’ve become separate things. But still, what I had envisioned and the sharpness of my body’s reaction is different. Maybe it was manageable when I was doing the SP and had physical strength left, but there’s nothing I can do about it and it was all shown in my performance (in FS). But if Iโ€™ll be honest, for example, swimmers do many races. Though the circumstances might be different. If I compare with those swimmers, I only participated in 3 competitions within 5 weeks. Then I only have this much physical power left. So now Iโ€™ve begun to think that I really use so much power to do my jumps and I have to be able to do a good jump in my own style while saving more energy. I didnโ€™t give up. I really fought till the end with everything I had left. If I hadn’t, I would not have done the 3F (4T-1Eu-3F instead of 3S) at that point.

Source: http://wasedasports.com/news/20191224_124725/